Children and discipline education

Children and discipline education

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All experts agree that it is a necessity to put the border to the child. So why is limiting so important to the child's development? Specialist Pedagogue Nilüfer EvginThe answer to this question is as follows: demek Setting the boundaries and showing the boundaries means to guide the children in a responsible way, to show the rules and values ​​required to live together by experiencing and teaching. Setting limits means security. Do you feel safe in a house with no walls, or do you feel safe in a house with walls and roofs? Here the walls and roof are boundaries and reassuring. There is a sense of happiness and freedom within the safe space. ”

How to set a limit?

Stability and openness in family relationships mean limits. How should the family achieve this determination? Agog In a family, one of the parents may be concerned about the limits, Ped says the pedagogue Nilüfer Evgin. He may be concerned that he cannot decide what is right and what is wrong because he cannot be the main decision-maker himself. Parents who approve and disagree with the limits may enter into domestic competition among themselves. They may have the fear of losing the love of their children. With this fear, they can make inappropriate and unstable decisions about borders. In some meaningless situations, they impose improper boundaries or, where it is necessary to place the original boundaries, they cannot limit them with the same fear and anxiety. All these behaviors cannot help us achieve the goal, they are obstacles. Again, in the eyes of the child, initially, the parent who sets the boundary appears to be gaining the anger of the child. With appropriate and insightful explanations, both parents should support healthy and balanced consistent behavior. They need to establish appropriate and balanced boundaries by talking to the child. ”

What to do for a successful parent and child interaction with your children:

· Your children should be focused and directed on their commendable, correct and good aspects. Children do not have to exhibit different and wrong behaviors if they think that their behavior is true and good and that their parents are aware of their work and that they can attract their parents' attention.

· You should praise your children for their appropriate and beautiful desired behavior. When your child exhibits the desired positive behaviors, you must praise and appreciate them. Thus, the desired movements and behaviors can be repeated frequently.

· Family members should establish rules by negotiating and agreeing with each other within the family, mother, father and child triangle. These rules, which apply to everyone, will make life easier and reduce unnecessary discussions. If there are rules that do not comply with the family order, they should be replaced by the appropriate regulation.

· As a parent, when you make some requests from your child, you should make good wishes by planning your wishes, at the right place and at the right time, with an appropriate expression, in short, with the principle of effectiveness. You must specify decisively what you want. Make sure that your child listens carefully to you while you are talking, and that it is carefully perceiving you. You should observe and monitor whether your request is being implemented.

· Parents should impose punishments against unwanted, undesirable behavior in their children. Just as good behavior is rewarded, it must be punished for undesirable behavior. The point to be considered should be discussed with the child beforehand and warned about unwanted behavior. However, if undesirable behavior has been established and maintained, a viable penalty should be imposed immediately behind the incident. This should be explained to the child. "We love you very much. What we do not like and do not want is this behavior. We do not punish you, this behavior you do." The penalties should never be in the form of feeding, drinking or love restrictions. In general, deprivation of certain things that the child loves should be in the form of restricting. Lifting a toy that he loves for a certain period of time, canceling his departure to a place he wants to go to, will not hurt him, but should be punished to tell him about the inaccuracy of his behavior.

During all these practices, it is necessary to be consistent, to keep their promises, to act together with the parents and not to compromise the principles of love and understanding. Penalties should not be imposed on those who are not suitable for their age and condition, grief or pleasure. Caution should be exercised as such penalties will adversely affect the relationship between child and parent.

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